and now folks...
i am officially sick as a dog. on my vacation, no less. woe is me.

there is only so much a girl can do when faced with cashmere at 60% off.

round here, we like our noses wet.
round here, it's only the people who like this crazy camera shit. the dogs run terrified unless tempted by cookies.

yesterday we scattered my grandma's ashes at sea. it was one of those downright amazing san francisco days- cold and clear and sunny, glistening water and amazing views of this white city. i wanted to take some pics of the ashes flying, or of the water afterwards when the ashes just landed, or of the water with the flowers in it. but i realized i had to just be in the moment and not try to capture it.
here's a picture of just the water that the lovely beau took from the boat. we're having fun with the camera.

this year for christmas, with the help of a lot of generous friends, i bought presents for 16 kids- 5 families. one of the families gave me a surprise- a present in return. it is the tackiest blanket i've ever seen- green with an enormous tiger on it. i couldn't wait to give it to the belle, as there was no way it was coming into my house unless it was for the dog. we got home christmas eve night, and the lovely beau, as he so often does, pointed out the poignant fact that this blanket had been purchased for me by a woman who works 20 hours a day, 5 days a week, and lives in a garage with her 3 sons. if it was in the house for guests, he pointed out, we have a really good story to tell about it. while i can't say the pic shows it's true glory, here is us, enjoying the blanket.


ps. don't you hope our children get his eyes?

so we got ourselves a canon a80 for xmas. yee-haw. can you tell i'm happy about it?

the next time you want to talk about the intense trauma of watching a dog fall off your porch down three stories, let me know.

yeah, i wanted something pink. but now you can't see the 'comments' button and i don't have time to deal with it until friday. comments are still there- you just have to move your cursor over to the area. do not let this stop all you talkative readers from putting in your two cents.

today, after screaming at my kids (perhaps not the most effective route of communication, but i was pissed after being told with quite an attitude that learning about WWII was not relevant) about the importance of education- that it is the key to unlock the doors of poverty, of racism, of all of their woes, i quoted a study i heard at some point that people with a college degree are happier than those without. the following conversation proceeded:

johnny: ms. brown, i don't believe that. you have a college degree and you are MISERABLE.
me: no, i'm not, johnny. i am really happy.
johnny: how can you be happy, ms. brown? you are in this tiny room all day, with all these kids who won't listen to you and just act crazy all the time.
me: well, i try not to let it get me down, johnny. i know why i'm here, and i believe in education.
johnny: also, ms. brown, you want to have kids and since you're living by the bible (they all think the radical decision not to have kids until after i'm married means i'm 'living by the bible') and your boyfriend won't marry you, you aren't happy with THAT either.
ms. brown (doubled over in laughter): he won't marry me? well, johnny, sometimes you reach a point in a relationship where the actual marriage is not such a big deal anymore- you already have a commitment.
johnny: but you don't have a life partnership, ms. brown.

note: this coming from a child who can't spell the word 'because'. but he knows about life partnerships.

recent searches that have brought folks over to posthipchick:

1. therapist cried during session
2. i am an 18 year old chick who got fucked in the ass

cleary, over here at posthipchick, we are rehashing old sexual moments with a therapist who simply couldn't handle it.

i would like to bring back the party favor bag at parties. won't you join my movement? just a little something for people to take with them... when did that become something only for children's birthday parties?
i am thinking of this due to the extreme pleasure i experienced when our dear friend anthony made a surprise appearance at the lovely beau's birthday shindig last night, complete with the girly gifts he had received in a gift bag at a recent party for the la weekly.
what did i get? this and this. really, enough to make a girl pretty happy.
oh, and this, but that was from his heart and not a gift bag.
i also got a lot of good advice on blogging, which i'm taking to heart. i take his advice because he is brilliant and articulate and funny, but mostly because he looks like a spiritual guru of some kind these days, so he must be right.

A Note On Boyfriends
They don't like it when you change their pet name of "Pumpkin" to "Pumpy".

you may or may not be hearing it here first, but there is an underground movement occuring as we speak within the Mexican-American community in California. To protest our "governer's" decision to take away all licenses from people here illegally, the Mexican community in California is going to stage a "walk-out" of sorts- by not going to work or school or shopping or spending any money this Friday. My kids, about half of whom are here illegally through no choice of their own, are really excited about it. It also makes for some very interesting conversations about power, and culture, and community that I would prefer to be having every day. Higher order thinking skills, my friends. Not fucking vocabulary words about volcanos. Fault me from here to China for thinking that THIS is more important than reading about magma and mount st. fucking helens. show me the door for taking a few days to - gasp!- veer from the state mandated scripted curriculum.
today i was talking to one of my students about what is bad and what is good about being mexican. one thing that he said was bad was that he couldn't go visit his family in mexico, because of his illegal status. he can't leave the country at all. i said "yes, and what if one day you wanted to go somewhere like europe!" he scoffed "ms. brown, c'mon. europe! have YOU been there?" i think i am the first person he's met who has been to europe. i got to tell him all about my limited experience, but to him, it was amazing. i don't know why i bother wondering how their world is so small, or why they feel their options are so limited, or why they join gangs and have unprotected sex. the world isn't "out there" for THEM, it's not an option. they have to stay right where they are and fuel our consumer identity as americans. i'm so furious right now i want to take a baseball bat to everything in my path. these are fucking KIDS. KIDS! we want to give them the world, throw on the lights, let them see. but no- they are brown and poor and count for shit. this has got to change, or i'm going down fighting.

my grandma just died. that's both my grandparents in less than a year. i have no more grandparents left.
my grandma's life was filled with a lot of anger and sadness and resentment. she was always slightly insane, but the alzheimer's she's been suffering from in the last few years has made it worse.
the one good thing that has happened to her is that after a lifetime of lovelessness- my grandpa and she got divorced over 50 years ago- she found a boyfriend in the assisted living home. they've been together about 5 years now and have moved to 3 different homes together. i'm glad she got that in her life. i'm also glad she's out of her misery.

i believe i failed to mention my accident on thanksgiving day. i may or may not have told you about belle's aggressive behavior towards dogs that are missing fur. this has become a recent issue because of the new rescue, casey, in our neighborhood. casey looks very similar to belle, but is considerably smaller (as are most dogs that are not great danes) and is missing fur. we have attempted to get them together so belle can adjust but it hasn't been completely successful. on thanksgiving, casey entered the park and belle started freaking. i put her on leash and sat down on a planter box to give her some time out to relax. belle then decided to lunge at casey and apparently 80 pounds of muscle can pull 120 pounds of flab straight through the air and onto one's ass on the cement. the pain was terrible, and for the last week and a half i've been noticably slower and bending over to get anything is no fun.
enter this evening. i was bending over to get a hat that dropped and, miracle of miracle, managed to line my tailbone up directly with a door frame and give it it's second major slam in a week and a half. if it wasn't fractured before, i'm going to guess i've succeeded on try #2.
the pain is something horrible, so much so that i'm not going to work tomorrow. no, instead i will dose up on some codeine, lie on my side, and use many heating pads. i'd go to the doctor, but according to all my online medical sources, they can't do anything anyway, except give me drugs (which i already have left over from the biopsy). which brings me to the fact that i sure am getting hit with the oddest fucking body problems this year.

i REALLY don't want to deal with tomorrow. i mean, REALLY.

there is a family ties marathon on tv land this weekend. 48 hours of my favorite tv show ever. i haven't left the house all day. it's some kind of heaven over here.

as i feed the belle leftover filet mignon and salmon from one of san francisco's finest restaurants, while i eat a frozen trader joe's pizza, i am left pondering how this situation is benefiting me.

i don't want to gloat too much about this, but two of my students who have been hovering around the 20 point range (out of 100) on this semester's tests got 70's on yesterday's test. i got to call two parents tonight who are used to hearing only about their children's failures, and tell them that they got C's! this is certainly significant gains.
thank you, thank you, thank you. moments like these make it feel worth it (even if i don't believe in standarized tests, and even the remaining 26 students are still hovering in the 50's range, if we're lucky). but you've gotta take it where you can get it these days.

happy half birthday to me
happy half birthday to me
happy half birthday dear poooooossssthiiiiiipchiiiiick
happy half birthday to ME!